Forget Me Nots Record Of The Week

Hey People

As I sit here on holiday trying to catch up with the massive amount of reading I have to do with VH1 Soul on in the background somehow making the task less laborious (Between ESPN and NFL Network, they are the only channels I watch nowadays) as usual my mind begins to race and I feel like writing. You're probably wondering:

"So if this is the case, why doesn't he f***ing blog more frequently?"

I know I always seem to have some sort of excuse but my mistress (my beautiful HP laptop, what can I say I'm a PC) is currently out of commission so I have to keep resorting to using my wifey (my ipod Touch) for any Internet related task. And anyone who has an iphone/touch knows it is not the one for typing.

Although there are other laptops around me they are so inferior that it makes even writing the simplest blog post a herculean task.

Anyway enough with the excuses, since I'm restless and I have been watching VH1 Soul Stage for like the last 5 hours I thought I'd hit you with a classic. Since it is Joe who is currently occupying the stage; I suddenly remembered how much I liked his music.

I remember my relationship to my girlfriend in year 9 which only lasted 3 weeks, I was young and dumb, who as an act of romance left an acapella medley on my voicemail for me to hear when I got back from school. I don't remember every song she took excerpts from but the one I do remember was Joe's - 'I Wanna Know'. She could really sing and I used to listen to it everyday until I forgot to save it as T-mobile deleted voice mails after 3 days in them days.

Although this is not my FMNROW, it does bring back pleasant memories. Joe is currently performing 'Stutter' which I personally feel is one of his best songs. But he is performing the remix version which I feel pales in comparison to the original.

So here it is, Joe - 'Stutter'

Self Realizations.... Coming to Terms with Myself

Since I have a lot of free time on my hands and I just love putting on some mellow music and losing myself within my mind I have come to some realizations.

1) One of the major realizations I have come to is that when it comes to looking retrospectively at the relationships with the females I have been involved with and what ultimately led to all the failures was a familiar trend. On recent reflections the reason why certain people would say I have been "unlucky" when it comes to relationships (which is a huge understatement) is because I have the strange knack of always getting involved with girls instead of women. Allow me to clarify. When I refer to a member of our species who is the owner of a double 'x' chromosome as a girl I am referring to their relative emotional, intellectual, spiritual and sometimes sexual immaturity. This is not to square the blame solely on the females I have been with but the difference in maturity has always caused problems. I have yet to female who shares most of my views when it comes to being in a relationship as complicated as they may be. But I know that I will never find what I am looking for inside of a girl pretending to be a woman. I do not know what it is but there must be something about me that continually attracts me to these girls. Nonetheless it is time I start entering into relationships with mature women if I am to have any hope of being in the kind of 'real' relationship that I envisage within my mind.

2) I have been coasting through life for the last three years. I have always been told that I am an individual with massive potential and I think that it went to my head a little bit. I haven't applied myself like I should have physically, academically or spiritually. That is not to say I have not achieved many things over the last three years, I have achieved loads but I could have achieved a whole lot more. I realise now that I have just been getting by on my natural ability and talent and if I am to be truly great and successful I need to start working harder.

3) Being around my cousin and her husband is teaching me more about relationships and more importantly a marriage than I ever have in my 21 years of existence. Seeing first hand what a young couple have to go through to make a marriage work in such testing times shows me the level of commitment I would need to have if I ever did get married.

4) I also have to admit that not everyone I know can be consistently impervious to my straight talking and sometimes just down right rude ways. I have concentrated more on the new friendships I have formed rather than maintaining the ones I already had. I also shy away from real contact because things like Facebook and MSN have made me lazy. It is for all these reasons that I almost lost a very good friend. I have not been a good friend to a number of people recently and I will try my very best to correct this. All I can ask is if I have inadvertently insulted you recently can you please let me know because I thought everyone got my own particular brand of humour but I was gravely mistaken. And to the friend I almost lost I can only apologize once again - I guess I forgot everything you have done for me and the things you put up with and I am sorry if I ever made you feel if you could no longer talk to me or if I no longer listened to you. You are a close friend that I value and I would never intentionally try to alienate you. But next time if I do something wrong can you please let me know in a much less heartless way.

5) Apologizing sincerely to someone is tough. I used to fake apologies just to shut people up and I was very good at faking sincerity. But when it comes to people I truly care about I have to be genuine.

6) I am still adamant that there is something wrong with my object cathexes. I miss no one at the moment. And all the people who think that telling me that they miss me would only insure to give me a big head - shame on you.

7) I need to start paying the music I love more.

8) I am not afraid to fail but for some reason it does seem like I am afraid to even try in the first place.

9) I know I flip-flop from being a breast man to a bum man and back again, but I think am truly a bum man. There ain't nothing sexier than a female with a nice bum which is proportioned to her body. I don't need a girl with a huge back off but a nicely proportioned one would be enough for me.

10) I have been real lazy in terms of my appearance. Like I put no effort into the way I have chosen to present myself recently. This is mostly down to me having to make sacrifices for the last year which prevented me from buying clothes, but this will all change very soon.

11) I really do need to blog more.

12) Roses really do smell like boo hoo hooooooooo.

13) I am getting really good when it comes to controlling my sexual urges. I will not disclose how long it has been since I was intimate with a female, but it has been a while and it has barely bothered me. Although this may soon change.

14) There are certain things that have happened to me in my life that I thought I had dealt with but it seems like the result of these life experiences have left me deeper mental scars than I had first acknowledged.

15) For the first time in my life, for the first time of me being on holiday - I have nothing to return home for. In the past I have always had something to return to London for but this is no longer the case. After about 18 years of continuous education I finally graduated from Uni and I am done with institutional education for the time being. So there is no academic reason for me to return. But what about my family I hear you say? Well, the days where I needed to remain in a close proximity to my mum are long gone. She is also starting a new life which is kind of forcing me to start my own. My brothers are both starting university and college respectively this month and no matter how much I may deny it, they are becoming men in their own right and I know they do not need me to oversee them as strictly as I did before. I have no girlfriend to return to (which is actually a good thing). As for my many friends, so much stuff has happened in such a short amount of time that it has placed us all on separate paths. The once naive notion that our paths would always somehow stay intertwined is a dead one. We are all growing up and finding our different vocations in life and it is for this reason that I feel both happy and sad. I am happy because I see people progressing but sad because in reality my attachments to all of you have weakened. This is not a bad thing, it is just a fact of life that everyone has different goals and to attain these goals people have to do what they have to do. For every year that I can remember I always had a friend back home who I was happy to return to because they needed me. But this year there is honestly no one that I feel that needs me so much that I need to return home for them specifically. This is not to say I will not be coming back but it does force me to wonder if my future does reside in London. Right now the only thing tying me there is my T-mobile contract and even that expires this month. I guess it is finally time for me to decide what my goals should be.

16) I don't consider myself a relationship expert in any sense of the word but I have somehow continually found myself in the unwanted position of an agony uncle. People seem to think that I must know a thing or two about relationships because I never seem to have any prolonged drama because of them. This is for the mere fact that I am a straight forward individual and I hate, and I repeat, I HATE drama. I nip it in the bud as soon as I see the weed taking root and drench it in weed killer just as an extra precaution. But however much I try to explain to people that ask for my advice that it will not help unless you are an extreme individual like myself I still find my words falling on deaf ears. But still I give out advice to those who ask for it knowing that my words will be wasted and they will do everything opposite to what I advised them to do and land themselves in the big, stinking, steaming pile of cow drama. And I've had enough. So I will no longer be giving advice to people who I feel cannot carry out what I advise them to do. So do not ask if you do not have the testicular or ovarian fortitude to do as I say, if not then what is the point in you asking for advice in the first place?

DAYUUUM.....Maxwell and Kerry

So I'm sitting here on holiday just relaxing watching my favourite channel - VH1 Soul (Seriously they need this back home) and the new Maxwell video comes on.

Now I knew Maxwell knew what being sexy was but after seeing this video he seriously took it to another level. Now I'm a big Maxwell fan and I am so glad he has finally returned. I have heard nothing but good things about his new album 'Black Summers' Night' and along with another 50 other albums I have missed out on from my other favourite neo-soul artists and I need to hurry up and listen to it properly.

Now usually when I am with a female I like and I want to set the mood I play a specific playlist and the first song is always Maxwell - Til' The Cops Come Knocking. But after seeing this video I think this song will have to take the top spot.

The video is just too SEXY. You'll understand when you watch it. I mean I want to marry Kerry Washington right now. Who knew she had it in her?


So here it is, Maxwell - Bad Habits

Forget Me Nots- Back In The Day Record Of The Week

I know certain people will only know this next group for one song. But Bell Biv DeVoe had much more good songs than just 'Poison'.

Most of you may not even know the song, or may know it as a cover from someone else. The proper video is on youtube right here but I wasn't allowed to embed it directly.

This tune has been on repeat on my ipod for the last few nights and I still cannot get enough of it.

So here it is, Bel Biv DeVoe - When Will I See You Smile Again